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Thirteen Things I Wish I’d Know Before I Got Married
By Nancy Lindquist | July 5, 2007
1. The little annoyances, will become bigger. In other words, if the toilet seat annoys you now, it will piss you off in thirteen years. Deal.
2. He’s holding his farts in. After you’re married he’ll stop doing that.
3. Marriage puts weight on your butt. Another thing you have to deal with.
4. Kids kill your sex life.
5. Sex is the absolute best the first year. After that, you get comfortable. In future years you will have to mix it up and work at it. That’s okay!
6. He’s got porn stashed somewhere and you won’t find it till you’ve been married a few years and no, he’s not looking at them to compare your butt to theirs. There is nothing to be jealous of.
7. He still thinks his mom is a great cook. Even if you Julia Child you way through the world.
8. He really likes the things you do and he’s not trying to be a jerk when he forgets to tell you.
9. He thinks you’re incredibly hot naked. Even with fat thighs and cellulite. Which he still does not see, even after thirteen years.
10. He has no idea if you, cut your hair, bought a new dress colored your hair. He really is clueless about that stuff. You could be wearing a bag and he would vaguely compliment you.
11. He’s not going to start putting the toilet seat down cause you yell. No matter how loud and long. Save your breath.
12. He still thinks he’s a God cause he can grill a piece of meat.
13. He really believes he’s the luckiest man in the world, cause you married him.
July 5th, 2007 at 7:49 am
Ok, so if you HAD have know these, would you have still gotten married?
Great list, ours is up if you want to stop by…
Bernie
July 5th, 2007 at 7:57 am
All very true, especially number 3. My butt used to be tiny! I think it might also have something to do with living in a Latino country, everyone has big booty here.
July 5th, 2007 at 2:33 pm
#7 is too true!
Although I burn water and he still believes I’m a barefoot contessa;)He’d better or no soup for him.
July 5th, 2007 at 7:32 pm
LMAO @ your numbers nine and ten! Ain’t it the truth. Thanks for a very funny list all around — gave me some good giggles.
Happy TT, and thanks for visiting mine!
July 5th, 2007 at 9:50 pm
Oh, I like #13!!!!!
And #2 just cracked me up =))
Thanks for visiting my T13!
July 6th, 2007 at 7:14 am
Interesting list…. Glad I’m married to the perfect man, *lol*!
Thanks for visiting my handfasting TT.